Ytivarg, Norse God of up.

Switzerland has less flat parts than a hyperactive toddler's plasticine model of a dancing hedgehog.

Instead Switzerland has 'up'. lots of up. Buckets and buckets of up. To be fair it has a decent amount of 'down' too, but all the down is just there to justify more up.

Need to go to work? That's some up.
Shops? That's an up.
Visit a friend? That's some up, a little down....then more up..

Up

Some more up

A bit more up for ya there now

(Please excuse the layout: trying to do this on a phone is awkward).



Every time you start down a slope, Gravity beckons you on "Hey, how's it going? Let me help you with those footsteps. Come on, let's get some marshmallows and maybe a beer.."

When you reach the bottom though, some malign transformation has taken place and gravity's evil, bearded twin is waiting "GET UP THAT HILL, YOU PIECE OF SLIME! I DON'T CARE IF IT'S VERTICAL; MOVE IT BEFORE I BREAK YOUR FACE!!"
I kind of imagine Ytivarg as a cross between a drill seargeant, pennywise the clown and an amalgam of all PE teachers ever.

Whoever laid out Switzerland's (pretty amazing, in fairness) 1000s of kilometers of well signposted 'wanderweg' paths must have secretly worshipped Ytivarg, as every path seems to delight in going over every single crest and undulation available. None of that utilitarian Roman 'straight A-B' nonsense here, oh no! No mountain will be missed, every bit of up will be visited!

So what better place than here to start my training? Well, I say "training" what I really mean is 'eat pizza while watching 'police academy'".

Anyone planning a long journey should consult this Oracle.

Instead of training I chose to procrastinate by planning instead: why do, when you can plan?!

I divided up the route into four stages (which I refered to as phase 1-4 in a vain effort to sound cool..).

The first step was getting from St gallen to Brugg, where i would then join the long distance 'Jura Crest' trail to la Chaux du Fonds, after that I'd make my way to Dijon. From Dijon I'd follow the GR2 trail northwest to leave and finally from there I'd go to Cherbourg to board a Dublin-bound ferry.

I had maps all over the shop, even colour coded key dates matched to each stage based on an approximation of how much distance I could cover in a day.

The procrasto-lair. Virtually all of this plan would be totally changed...

The plan immediately fell to bits.

Turns out that the ferry I had intended to take does not accept foot passengers, instead I'd have to take a ferry to Rosslare and walk north to dublin.

Wecome aboard, every one!  NOT YOU, PEDESTRIAN!!

As I only had a limited time before the start of the new school year in late August,  this extra few hundred km threw the whole shambolic enterprise into jeopardy. So I just started early.

I decided that, provided I walk every step of the journey, I'd allow myself a couple of side trips (i want to see the louvre!) Once i pick up from the exact spot I left off. Saying this may be pedantic but for the sake of full disclosure.. :)

After school a week or two ago, I walked from my apartment in St gallen to gossau
the next town westward, the next day from there to Wil (the next town) etc until just before finishing school (and taking a couple of days to see a couple of concerts) I had reached Zurich.

 The next morning I started this blog yoke, cleaned up the pizza crust and left my apartment.

I was already hungry.